What makes us attractive? It's a bit of a mystery...
Published 8 February 2013
Do you understand how men / women feel about you - and why? If you're looking for love, here's your chance to peer into the mind of your potential partner. If you've already found love, it might help you understand your partner better.
We all want to be loved, but how well do we understand what makes us loveable? Recent research indicates: not very well at all.
With help from Opinium, we asked over 2,000 people what they think makes someone a desirable partner. Then we asked them what other people think...
Mars & Venus - Are we really from two different planets?
It's an old line: men are from Mars and women are from Venus. Could that explain why it's so hard to know what the opposite sex wants?
The Mars mind-set
So what do men think women are looking for?
First of all, men think women are a lot more money-minded than they really are. 30% of men reckon women want a man with lots of money, but they couldn't be more wrong. A mere 6% of people who are attracted to men said it was important.
Wrongness ratio - 5:1
And it seems men don't 'get' what women really are after. Just 13% of the men we asked said women want a man who shares their interests - but a full 38% of the people attracted to men said it was important.
Wrongness ratio - 3:1
The view from Venus
On the other side of the coin, it looks like men's minds are a mystery too.
Men appreciate intelligence a lot more than their partners think! Just 16% of women think men are looking for a partner with brains - but a full 45% of the people who like women said it does make a woman attractive.
Wrongness ratio - 3:1
Women also pay far too much attention to their wardrobe. 32% of them reckon men want a well-dressed woman. When we asked women's partners (and would-be partners), just 7% of them said 'being well dressed' was important in a woman.
Wrongness ratio: 4½:1
What makes a woman attractive?
People** who think it's important in a woman
Women who think men want this in a partner
A good sense of humour
67%
36%
Intelligence
45%
16%
Good looks
43%
69%
Being a good listener
15%
15%
Being well dressed
7%
32%
What makes a man attractive?
People*** who think it's important in a man
Men who think women want this in a partner
A good sense of humour
38%
13%
Intelligence
29%
25%
Good looks
20%
36%
Being a good listener
8%
19%
Being well dressed
6%
30%
| People** who think it's important in a woman | Women who think men want this in a partner | |
| A good sense of humour | 67% | 36% |
| Intelligence | 45% | 16% |
| Good looks | 43% | 69% |
| Being a good listener | 15% | 15% |
| Being well dressed | 7% | 32% |
| People*** who think it's important in a man | Men who think women want this in a partner | |
| A good sense of humour | 38% | 13% |
| Intelligence | 29% | 25% |
| Good looks | 20% | 36% |
| Being a good listener | 8% | 19% |
| Being well dressed | 6% | 30% |
* Opinium Research carried out 2,016 online interviews between 1st and 4th February 2013
** % of all respondents, regardless of gender, who are attracted to women.
*** % of all respondents, regardless of gender, who are attracted to men.